I learned something today, and no my clinical instructors did not aid me in this learning. God did. And I know for those of you that will read this, my moment of revelation may be a "duh" one for you, but I still must share.
These past four weeks of clinicals have consumed me. My thoughts, my sleep, my actions. Literally, I am eating, sleeping and breathing nursing. My mom warned me of this beforehand. I feel so completely wrapped up in it, as if the rest of my life is a blur. While studying, my worries distract me and I start dwelling on the future, all the "what if's" etc. What if I don't succeed, what if I don't make it to graduation. What if I can't even perform my nursing skills completely and successfully. God spoke to me in a very powerful way this evening. He said, "my child, why do you fret, why do you worry, have I not been faithful? You worry so much and over such a small circumstance compared to the grand scheme of everything. Your abilities as a nurse do not change your relationship with me. The world will pass, but my love will not."
I stand so humbled. I was forgetting that God is sovereign, and ulitmately in control over every aspect of my life. Yes, I need to be focused and diligent while studying nursing, but I can't loose site of the end goal and what matters most - my relationship with God and spending eternity with Him.
Proverbs 3:5 (a favorite of mine)
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths
Lamentations 3:22-23
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an ends; they are new every morning, great is your faithfulness.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
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2 comments:
So glad God met you in that way even in the midst of all the busyness of nursing school! I was encouraged in a similar way this morning from Eph. 1:3-7 - if God has forgiven me, redeemed me, adopted me, chosen me, loved me, why should I doubt that he will give me any other blessing in Christ?
Thanks for sharing what you're learning, Brenna. That is such an evidence of grace in your life-that you are humbly listening for the Lord's voice and wanting to hear Him.
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